Help? Bluffing can be effective when trying to get your partner to admit they are cheating, but if they don't buy your bluff, they won't admit what's really going on. Why not leave me and go be single and have all these women he can have. Need Ladies and men insight. When your husband is lying about cheating, hell turn away from you and you know hes cheating! My husband is a recovering sex addict and a recovering alcoholic. I didnt ask him to deactivate his account that was his decision. Your husband is being very deceitful, even when he knows you KNOW what hes doing, he continues to manipulate you He is not husband material. The problem I have is that he says he can tell if I have sex with someone else. If youre using a condom on your penis, you are putting it somewhere!). Sexually he changed didnt pay me no attention I felt in my gut he was cheating but he assured me I was crazy my gut never lied in the past. Ive never seen tears come from a man, but today he was crying, telling me how much he loved me and how he didnt want to loose me, and how sorry he is.! I am currently getting help for my self..which he stated that he wanted to help me, he told me he was going to end his affair..but he still said he didnt feel the same about me ..I still love him very much. I kicked him out tonight. There was another married couple, her, and another female who was single. I love him with all my heart, but if there is no trust there is no life together. buy a gps on ebay .. $40 and the monthly subscription to track it is only $10 .. and/or put a sound activated recorder in his vehicle .. you are married so youre allowed. Meeting her may help alleviate your concerns that your husband is cheating or it may confirm your suspicions! He had an affair of the heart spending time with a woman that he knows everything about and maybe that worries you more than whether he had sex. Thank you. I have the gut feeling, but he has a quick tongue and am not sure what to believe. 4) He is very frequently secretive with his phone, for example, he may go into another room to go on his phone, especially in the bathroom, where he will be for approximately 20 minutes at a time. I have no place to go, my family lives in Atlanta and I have no money saved. They text and call each other on a daily basis. I was in such a state about Mom, that clearly I wasnt thinking but did email her and assumed by hearing from me and knowing my mother was dying , this woman woukd have the decency to respect boundaries. I was married 27 years never thought my husband would had done this. Trust me, what this dumbasses doing is just one little page in the entire book of your life. Im left sitting here for 3 or so months now feelin the fool and like Ive lost my mind. I have given everything. I hope you have friends or family that you can lean on, to help you through this. And it hurts to be slapped in the face with this realism. I feel like I cant win here. i pushed him out from my flat and he kick the door and got broken. And, you think someone who wants to cheat on his wife is a valued friend? He got VERY ANGRY and told me off. Im not sure where to begin becuase there are so manny points. Deeply. I wonder how your wife feels about your cheating on her, and telling her about it. The first two weeks I moved, things were normal. Be prepared for lies, although if he wants to save his marriage, he should be prepared to tell you the whole truth. IT MIGHT SOUND SO STRANGE TO YOU BUT IT FEELS LIKE ME WHEN I READ YOURS MY HUSBAND HAS BEING HAVING AFFAIR WITH HIS PERSONAL ASSISTANT FOR ABOUT 3 YEARS NOW AND IT WAS NOT HIM WHO SPILLED THE BEANS IT WAS HER AND WHEN I ASK HE GETS ANGRY AND DENIES IT ALL THE TIME BUT I KNOW IT HAS BEEN HAPPENING THE LYING , WORKING LATE THEY ALWAYS TOGETHER BUYS HIS CLOTHES GOES TO THE CHEMIST TAKES HIS CLOTHES TO THE TAILORS AND BELIEVE ME SHE IS NOTHING TO LOOK AT SHE IS HUGE AND SO OVER WEIGHT AND SHE IS ALWAYS AT OUR HOUSE IM A HAIRDRESSER SO I WORK WEEKENDS SO WHEN I GET HOME SHE WILL BE AT OUR HOUSE TILL LATE IT HAS GOT SO BAD THAT I HAVE BANNED HER FROM OUR HOUSE MY BOYS ALSO DONT LIKE HER IT FEELS LIKE SHE IS HIS SECOND WIFE. So I asked him again and told him I wanted an direct answer. What privacy does a husband deserve FROM HIS WIFE? Love yourself! I accidently discovered some condoms in his suitcase. . this set off many alarms. Im not married but I have a baby with my live in partner. i just completed my first degree programme and i am so shy to tell anyone these problems cos my dad felt i was rather getting married way too early.i feel like i should go back to my dads house but i cant because my marriage ceremony was just the talk of town. Why arent you guys married, after more than four years together? Emotional cheating is just as destructive especially when men dont realize theyre doing it. That is a very dangerous place to be. If he talked about it, then at least we could deal with it somehow. I know this because I caught him making out with a woman in his car outside a bar 2 years ago. it seems as the women, we are the ones trying to be right, do right and we get stabbed in the back. Is this ok? Can you live with him as he cheats on you? What I dont get is if hes not married and cares about her why dose he not break off the marriage? When were telling the truth and are with people we like, admire, and trust, we face our belly buttons towards them. We've been together 26 years and I don't want my marriage to end. Listen to your gut. but yes it is wrong. he kept on ringing in my ears that he was the most loyal man i could ever find and probably the only one to love me best. An incident happened this weekend and I wantnto get your opinion on this. Whenever i ask him what is wrong, why he is showing cold shoulder to me? He wont touch me or even sleep next to me anymore. From that day i told him please stay away from me. Its hidden so he wont see. when you ask your man are you cheating on me, you are actually saying in your place, I would have already cheated, I cant believe you havent yet. I know EXACTLY what you mean .. that nagging feeling .. it is thegut instinct I keep reading about here .. he treats me like the he does with the kids. Are you wondering how to react - or even if youll ever recover from the news? When he messaged back saying, cant talk. What are you doing in this relationship anymore. Otherwise, youre going to have to play detective. So when you say to check his phone and email I already do so he would know how to hide it really good specially sense he knows a lot about computers. My husband has fooled, hurt and betrayed me for so many years, I think I rather be in a relationship with a woman before another man. I didnt know how to deal with my pain at first because his hurtful behavior was something I had never experienced before. If I was in ur shoes, I would sit down and have heart to heart talk with him. Its not that easy to cut and run when its not just you to consider. He pulls another trick. He's not going to change his character-assassinating . Hes been in and out of hospitals. Saying he loves me so much, how it kills him that he hurt me the way he did, says soooo incredibly much..but DOES nothing to show it. He said that she had friend requested him and then he changed his story and said that he had requested her to get more coins for a game.. To me the Facebook friendship never made any sense. AFTER ABOUT 3 WEEKS, I TOOK HIM UP ON HIS INVITATION TO COME TO HIS MOTEL ROOM. I cried. Well he mustve said something to her, because shes since blocked me and taken herself off of his fb page which made me feel a little better but hed been talking to her the entire time weve been together. He owes you half of everything. Some of them will deny an affair even if you present them with hard evidence. But I do think between him and me, it was an emotional connection. When i asked if anything happened with this girl he said no and that he is very happily married to me. Youve caught him cheating three times. He has sincerely told me he loves me, is still in love with me and wants to spend the rest of his life with me. I have cheated as well and Im more than willing to disclose my infidelities while we were together. Yet another one. Long story short he left me 3 hours away from home and went back home, after he realized he screwed up he called crying. Because he/she is a coward. She replied asking him how is he emailing her from that email. Tells me as a VOLUNTEER FIREMAN & EMT, needs to respond to calls. I think counseling is a good idea even if you decide to stay, because you need to learn how to live with a husband you dont trust. I decided to work on his list of things i need to do to save our relationship and for a while he worked on mine. He always go to work even weekends. It limits me so much. He subtly gets onto me for every dime I spend that he thinks is not necessary. Wanted our kids to do well so he looked good . I live for 39 he 23 years. If monogomy were natural, then why would so so many people cheat? We dont live together, but (two times ) when were talking on the phone while everything is so crazily amazing his phone rang and he did not pick up the phone, which is odd since sometimes he does. So he was not getting sex. In a few days from that first prayer, something kept gently nudging me one night check his phone. You will find another man, someone who wants only you. My best advice is to divorce him. Hes the three things he says he hates the most. Your strength will grow. We started dating other people for about 2 years. Neuman also said that lying is worse than the actual cheating. I wish I had known everything before we were married. Start paying close attention to detail. About 3 months ago(2015) on a Thursday morning at 7:50am in the morning my husbands cell phone rang while we were being intimate. Put simply, if he has been cheating, this tool is likely to make it immediately obvious. Dating advice for women and men, plus tips for love relationships. we all deserve to live and be loved. And i think he is starting up again. He turned it on me and said I dance with other men too true but not like that. If he can find a way to string three women along, so much the better!). He never really says he loves me or goodnight or good morning and when I confront him about it he apologizes, says hell change it, but does nothing and still ignores me. Youre picking up on signals and signs, and your gut instincts arent wrong. God Bless. Sorry for anyone having to go through this. What bothers me most is that he never erased them and that he is sending them out too and making coments to his friends about being with them. If you confront your husband based on rumors or fake news, its not going to end well or provide any closure for you. 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